Today was no different. We made the short trip to the cemetery. As we drove down the dirt road towards Jared's grave, I remembered the family that lost their mom around the same time Jared died. They made daily trips to the cemetery and so did I. We would see each other each day. No words were exchanged but we shared a common bond. The loss of someone dear and the need to be close to them.
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| Jared's 13th Birthday |
Today William and I stood in front of Jared's grave again. We talked about Jared's 13th birthday, the last one we celebrated with him. William had brought a birthday cake home with a fishing theme including a fisherman on top. Our family likes to fish. Grandma Dess and Grandpa Tom joined us for dinner and cake. We celebrated Jared becoming a teenager and looked forward to the summer ahead. We didn't realize that day that our lives were about to change only a few weeks later.
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| Grandma Joyce and Jared - 1988 |
Today William went back to the SUV and called Adam. I was not ready to leave yet so I walked around. I noticed the gravestone of a lady buried nearby who died on May 8, 2005... the day Jared turned seven. Another young man buried near her shares Jared's birthday too. He would be 38 today. His family had already visited his grave and left presents.
Today was more emotional for me than in recent years. I normally have moments of sadness but I'm okay knowing that Jared is in heaven. When Jared first died I would ask God why. I couldn't understand why Jared had to leave us. But over the years I've learned to trust that God has a plan for each of us and rest in that. I think this year is more emotional because we lost my stepmom, Joyce, a few weeks ago. She was a special lady and our hearts hurt that she is not with us anymore. The day after Joyce died I was sitting in my office at work and looked at Jared's picture on my desk. I realized that Jared and his Grandma Joyce were now together in heaven. Tears started to flow but also peace knowing they were together again.
Today we remember. Today we look back but also look ahead. All is well.
"Brothers, we do not want you to be ignorant about those who fall asleep, or to grieve like the rest of men, who have no hope. We believe that Jesus died and rose again and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in Him. According to the Lord's own word, we tell you that we who are still alive, who are left till the coming of the Lord, will certainly not precede those who have fallen asleep. For the Lord Himself will come down from heaven, with a loud command, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet call of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first. After that, we who are still alive and are left will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. And so we will be with the Lord forever. Therefore encourage each other with these words." 1 Thessalonians 4:13-18
